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“I’m on the bus”

10/07/2013
Get on board! Riders pay their $1.25 fare and file onto a University of Maine  Bangor Area Transit bus outside the Pickering Square parking garage recently

Get on board! Riders pay their $1.25 fare and file onto a University of Maine bound Bangor Area Transit bus outside the Pickering Square parking garage recently

No matter where I go in the world, public transportation always offers great entertainment. The oddballs. The hustlers. The bad. The beautiful and the just plain strange.

In Bangor, it’s the loud talkers.

On a recent bus ride to campus I overheard… actually the ENTIRE BUS overheard a bizarre telephone conversation I’m still trying to figure out. It involved a frizzy-haired, middle-aged woman wearing a tight scoop neck t-shirt and an excessive amount of silver bracelets.  She had a heart-shaped “mom”  tattoo on her bicep that was clearly inked before tattoos were considered hip. A Santa-sized white plastic bag was plopped on an adjacent seat. It overflowed with packages of paper towels.

Here’s what everyone on the bus heard:

“DoannnSTOP. beeeleeeev-inn: hold on…HELLO?”

….

“I’m on the bus.”

….

“I’m on the bus.”

….

“I’m on the bus.”

….

“I’m on the bus.”

….

“I’m on the city bus. I love you.

…..

I went shopping. My monthly shopping to buy cleaning supplies.”

…..

“I’m on the bus. I’m on the city bus.”

…..

“I go shopping once a month for cleaning supplies. I’m on the city bus.”

…..

“I’m on the bus.”

…..

“OK. I love you.”

Later, as we rumbled through Orono the woman called out to the bus driver from her rear seat.

“Hey Bubba,” she said. “Can you drop me off at the Thrift Way?”

For those of you not familiar with Orono landmarks, the Thrift Way is a liquor store.

Bubba grunted.

Did that mean he would stop?

Sadly I had to ring the bell, my stop was next.

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From → Bangor, People, School

One Comment
  1. “I’m on the bus, I’m on the bus
    I’m on the city bus, I love you”

    “I ride with Bubba when I can,
    He hauls me to get my Spic-N-Span,
    A month may go by before I join his route,
    I always load-up cuz I may run out”

    “I’m on the bus, I’m on the bus
    I’m on the city bus, I love you”

    Maybe we can get Frank Zappa to write the tune for this song?

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